Please get me out of this BL novel...I'm straight! - Chapter 20: ’Kill ’Em With Kindness’

“Ji Xiao Li” Chen Yu Bai pressed the body under him and gritted his teeth, “What exactly did I owe you in my past life?”

“I…don’t…know..but you don’t know too? Aren’t you a fortune teller?”

At this instant, even the thousand years ice jade bed under them can feel the chill emitted by this man.

“I am the Grand Tutor! Great Divination Master! Don’t call me a fortune teller!”

- Description from Novelupdates

Two-way crush, tough guy attack, chicken suffer [You read that right! doge
The company is particularly down-to-earth this year, giving each person a live chicken that year.
Du Xiao looked at the hen whose neck was too fat in other people’s hands, and then looked at the skinny pheasant in his own hand: “…”
Chairman: “Don’t carry your wings, it will make him uncomfortable, so he should hold it in his arms.”
Du Xiao: “…”
Chairman: “Remember to bring it when you visit relatives and friends, don’t bore him at home, and treat him well.”
Du Xiao: “…”
Chairman: “Go home, happy Spring Festival!”
Du Xiao: “…Why didn’t I see the young master today? I haven’t said goodbye to him yet.”
Chairman: “Cough cough… I don’t know, I probably ran away from home.”
Du Xiao: “…”
Du Xiao: Hormone burst decathlon, taciturn, loyal dog bodyguard attack
Zhou Zhan: I am addicted to life and can’t take care of myself
Sweet sweet!

Content tags: sweet text, special liking, near water towers, ghosts and monsters
Search keywords: Protagonist: Du Xiao, Zhou Zhan ┃ Supporting role: ┃ Others: Zodiac

- Description from novelbuddy

Johnathan, an old man with an extraordinary past but an ordinary end, gets reincarnated in a dark fantasy world full of magic, darkness, and mysteries furled.

However, he committed a grave blunder by taking the fiction he had read as a reference. Reborn as a baby, he hoped to be deemed gifted by speaking early.

One thing led to another, and tragedy struck. The villagers declared him a demon-possessed and called the church. Johnathan, now known as Sylvester Maximilian, realized that he had messed up.

When the church's inquisitors came to judge him and burn him on a pyre. As a last resort and to welcome his soon to arrive second death, he started chanting holy hymns as his last breath.

Overwhelmed, they kneeled, thinking he was a messenger of Solis.

From there, the story of how Sylvester Maximilian rose through the ranks to sit at the top began.

But his life won't be ordinary, as he uses his cunning and the tag of 'God's favored' to his advantage. Fighting treachery, unearthing secret plots and world mysteries, facing the darkness around him and creating his place in history, engraving his name in the annals to be forever remembered as the—Immortal Pope, The Young.

[A/N: To not mislead you, the novel's name does not mean he instantly becomes the Pope from the start. The story will follow the life of MC. Though he will become the Pope at a pretty young age. 40% of the novel will be based around MC fighting to sit on the supreme throne.

If you enjoy world building and lore building, then you will like this story.]
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***Main Tags: FANTASY, ADVENTURE, MAGIC, DARK, STRONG MC(Weak at the start because he's a baby. Not an instant OP though.), WHOLESOME, COMEDY, KINGDOM BUILDING. MENTALLY OLD MC, Politics, Backstabbing, World Building.***

[WARNING: MC will not go around saving everyone. Absolutely not if it puts him in danger. But if he can save someone using his status or position in the church, he will. He will kill innocent people if he has to. MC is not crazy, cynical, or unsociable. The world at some times may seem very DARK.]
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[DISCLAIMER]
The religion will be fake. I won't make it similar to those existing in our world not to trigger anyone. However, the Church terminologies and designations may feel identical as they are simple vocabulary words.

Again, everything you read in this novel is fictional and has no relation to our world.

I hope you enjoy my work. Stay safe and eat healthy bananas.
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When Jiang Cheng was told to return to a family that he never knew or had a relationship with, he had never expected to end up meeting a young girl, and eventually, her seemingly roguish brother Gu Fei, as a first encounter in the new city.