I Am the Only Fertile Woman in the Game-Chapter 210: Carl’s Illusion

Hallucinogens were classified as a Schedule I prohibited substance by the Federation.

However, the original components of hallucinogens were used in medicine, intended to calm the violent Beastmen. Therefore, doctors like Kai could obtain small amounts after filing a report.

It was he who gave Carl hallucinogens, and this was the thing he regretted the most in his life, incomparably so.

Initially, Carl was only a heavy drinker, drunk to oblivion every day, waking up in various places the next day, then repeating the previous day’s routine: drinking, fighting, getting wasted, abusing Breakthrough, sleeping by the roadside, waking up, drinking, fighting...

He had been imprisoned three times for causing trouble. Each time, it was Kai who went to the federal prison to bail him out.

Because Carl had previously worked as a Scavenger, some friends or descendants of those he had assassinated found out his whereabouts. They followed him when he was drunk, stabbed him four or five times from behind. One time, they almost severed his hand.

Yet, Carl did not fight back; he lay on the ground, laughing uproariously, his laughter making his attackers uncomfortable, until his face was streaked with tears.

If Kai hadn’t arrived in time each time, Carl would have probably died as he wished.

Once, Kai was very angry, grabbed him by the collar, lifted him up, and demanded to know why he lived like a mess. Carl’s laughter was uglier than crying.

"Because I’ve been dead a long time," Carl said.

Kai understood the meaning behind his words.

The person he loved had died, and he had died along with her that day. Only his body was still alive.

Carl wouldn’t attempt suicide like Sikoses, because he couldn’t bear to, always fantasizing: What if, just what if, I died and she woke up right after? Wouldn’t it be a loss?

So, he lacked the courage to kill himself.

But he couldn’t live a single day through the long days without her.

Kai knew his personality; if this continued unchecked, he really would end himself.

Thus, for the first time, not for a medical procedure, he injected Carl with a medical version of a hallucinogen, intended to soothe his nerves.

After the injection, Carl indeed improved; he stopped drinking and even took time to groom himself, making sure he didn’t look so disheveled. He would hold a bunch of flowers from sunrise to sunset, no one knowing what he was waiting for.

Kai thought all this was part of his recovery process.

But he was wrong.

The side effects of hallucinogens include addiction and the occurrence of hallucinations, leading to a series of physiological symptoms. Initially, patients feel that these hallucinations are very real, but upon waking, they regain cognition and clearly understand they were hallucinations. Only those in extreme pain depend on the hallucinations, unable to detach even when they clearly know they are hallucinations.

Even though Kai had been very cautious using a very small dose, Carl still experienced hallucinations.

He once again embraced that soft, slender body; the Lily of the Valley’s fragrance surrounded him, her hair lightly brushing against his cheek, she smilingly said to him, "Carl, if you keep this up, I’ll ignore you."

Carl, anxious, held her tightly, "Don’t go, I won’t make you angry anymore, stay."

"Suisui, I miss you so much... "

"You promised me, to have a home with me, don’t leave me alone..."

"Why are your hands so cold? Why won’t you look at me?"

"Will you look at me, please?"

"Will you take me with you?"

Carl cried out and awoke from the bed, the pillow already drenched. The hallucinogen was gradually metabolized in his body and began to fade.

He stared blankly at the mirror in the hospital room, seeing his stubble and ashen complexion, and hastily got out of bed.

"I can’t go see her like this, she might change her heart..."

Carl, long missing, took care of himself seriously, put on brand new clothes, bought her favorite bouquet, then lay on the bed, closed his eyes, and prepared to meet her again.

But this time, he couldn’t fall asleep no matter how long he waited.

He went out and ran twenty laps, came back drenched in sweat, lay back on the bed again, clutching the bouquet with a faint smile on his lips.

Ten minutes passed, an hour passed, three hours passed...

Carl struggled to fall asleep.

He coaxed himself, muttering, "Sleep now, she’s waiting for you in the dream, she’s going to take you away, sleep now."

Eventually, Carl, after numerous attempts, finally fell into a light sleep, but this time, he did not see the person he wanted to see.

Upon waking, he sat motionless in front of the window, holding a bouquet.

The sun rose and set until the moon spilled over his shoulders, and only then did he slowly get up and sneak into the pharmacy in the deep silence of the night, taking away all of Kai’s hallucinogens.

He used a breakthrough to reach the small building, that room he had once lived in; he took off his shirt and gave himself an injection of hallucinogens.

Carl hung his head, waiting for something, and a few seconds later, he heard footsteps at the door. Soon after, a small head peeked in, a timid expression on her face, and seeing him, she asked in surprise, "Are you... are you alright?"

"Wait, I’ll go get some tools to help you."

Carl stared blankly at her, a surge of emotion welling up in his throat, his eyes suddenly reddening.

The scene was identical, the expression the same as the first time he had come to her inn, and she had spoken these words while seeing to his wounds.

Carl smiled, a tear instantly falling, as he watched her, repeating the words from before, but now his tone was one of immense nostalgic tenderness.

"No need."

"Come here."

He watched ’Qiao Suisui’ come over, threw away the syringe in his hand, and hugged her tightly.

"You... how could you..."

"How could I?"

Carl repeated the dialogue with her, now in tears, but still tried to choke out lightheartedly, "Never seen it before? I thought you were a female from the Sikoses... You’ve seen at least this little drama... After all, this little drizzle compared to the injuries he’s endured is....trivial."

Next should have been her nauseated by his tease, but unexpectedly, the hallucination of ’Qiao Suisui’ wrapped her arms around him in return.

Carl’s tears gushed forth, no longer suppressible.

He embraced her and broke down sobbing.

"Why did you leave me, why didn’t you take me with you..."

"How cruel you are to me..."

"Let me go with you, I can’t wait anymore..."

"Please, take me with you..."

The scene twisted, and Carl abruptly opened his eyes, his cheeks still streaked with tears.

He looked around dazedly, realizing he was still in the room of the small building, only now it was empty, and the room, long uncleaned, was covered in a thick layer of dust.

Carl wiped the tears from his face and expressionlessly injected himself again.

In the hallucination, footsteps came from the door once more.

The peeking small head, the timid expression, the delicate figure.

"Are you... are you alright?"

"Wait, I’ll go get some tools to help you."

Carl calmly called out to her, gently saying, "No need. Come here."

...

Over and over, again and again.

Syringes littered the floor.

Carl repeatedly awoke in the hallucination, and then within the hallucination, he consciously succumbed.

"Are you... are you alright?"

"...I miss you so much."

"Wait, I’ll go get some tools to help you."

"I really miss you so much..."