Modern Family: New Life-Chapter 109: Secrets revealed

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing," Haley replied after a few seconds, her tone dripping with fake innocence.

"Just that it must be so fun to talk about such boring topics... instead of, you know... living real life," she added, with a dismissive smile.

The tension in the living room thickened.

Pippa kept her expression neutral.

Manny glanced around, clearly uncomfortable. He hadn't realized there was so much tension, and he didn't know the exact reasons behind it.

Andrew closed his eyes for a moment, mentally bracing for what was coming.

Alex, on the other hand, had completely lost her patience,"You know what's fun?" she snapped, leaning forward.

"Not making a fool of myself by following your stupid advice."

"I never told you to go kiss him like some desperate loser!" Haley shot back immediately, rolling her eyes, "I just said to do it soon... or he might think you're a lesbian."

"At least you finally got rid of those hideous sandals," she added, eyeing Alex's new shoes with a mocking smile.

Alex opened her mouth, clearly about to explode, but before she could unleash whatever she was thinking, Pippa raised a hand, stopping her with a calm yet firm gesture.

"What exactly do you mean by 'living real life'?" Pippa asked, her tone so composed it bordered on threatening, "Partying every night? Getting bad grades? Not caring about your future?"

Haley stared at her, narrowing her eyes, but didn't respond.

Pippa kept her voice steady, each word delivered with surgical precision:

"Because if that's what you mean... I've got bad news for you. That all ends when high school does. And then 'real life' is going to hit you, and it's going to hit hard."

The silence that followed was absolute.

Even Luke, who had been flipping through a magazine, stopped turning the pages.

Manny blinked, impressed.

In his own way, he thought it was a brilliant response, and maybe even advice few dared to say aloud.

Alex, sitting beside him, nodded slightly, clearly agreeing with every word Pippa had said.

In that moment, she admired her even more, for saying what she herself had wanted to scream at her sister so many times.

Haley couldn't come up with a clever response. And, as usual when she ran out of arguments, she went straight for the personal attack.

"Forgive me, Your Highness, for not being as perfect as you. You must feel so superior to everyone, huh? Straight A's, always the smartest in the room... and now the trophy girlfriend with the school's quarterback drooling over her," Haley said with a disdainful sneer.

Pippa blinked, caught off guard. She hadn't expected Haley to go so directly and so low.

Seeing her hesitate for a second, Haley smiled with that typical cruelty, and didn't stop.

"Must be nice having everything handed to you, right? What's next? A little trophy for Perfect Girl of the Year? Or are you gonna start a club to remind the rest of us how inferior we are compared to your big, fabulous life?" she finished.

Andrew, who had stayed silent until now, sat up on the couch and looked at Haley with a serious expression, one rarely seen on his face.

"That's enough, Haley," he said.

Haley looked at him defiantly, "Do you defend her because she is your girlfriend? It's not true? So now we can't say anything just because Miss Perfect thinks she can come here and give us all life lessons? Even to my own sister?"

"I'm defending her," Andrew began, his voice steady, "because I won't sit here while someone who has no idea what they want in life insults someone who does, someone who works hard, has goals, and will go far."

Haley narrowed her eyes, but Andrew didn't stop.

"You want to live day by day, go with the flow, do whatever you want without thinking about the future? Fine. That's your life. But that doesn't give you the right to mock other people for being different."

A heavy silence followed. Andrew wasn't done, though he debated for a moment whether to say the next part. But remembering Haley's toxic words to Pippa, he chose to continue.

"You know why your sister goes to Pippa for advice and not to you? Because when Alex tries to talk about her interests, about what she's passionate about, you make fun of her. Because when she wants to be serious about her future, you make her feel like she's some kind of freak."

Haley pressed her lips together, her expression hardening.

Andrew leaned in slightly, finishing the blow, "It's not just about the advice on the guy. This started way before that. Don't blame Pippa because Alex turns to her. That distance between you and your sister, Haley... you created it."

Haley opened her mouth, as if to say something, but no words came out.

"If you want Alex to come to you for advice, then be a better sister," Andrew concluded.

The impact was immediate.

Haley's eyes grew glossy, and she looked away, struggling not to break down in front of everyone.

Manny, sitting in his chair, stared at Andrew like he'd just witnessed a real-life movie hero. Up until that moment, he'd never been particularly impressed by the family's "golden boy athlete."

But right then, seeing Andrew stand so firmly for what was right, he couldn't help but genuinely admire him.

Alex, off to the side, lowered her head for a moment, a faint smile forming on her lips. She felt grateful.

Pippa, sitting next to Andrew, looked at him, her eyes shimmering, clearly moved and thankful that he had defended her with such passion.

She knew Andrew and Haley had always been close, like siblings. Seeing him now, standing up so firmly, even against Haley, just to protect her and Alex... it touched her more than she'd expected.

But Haley, unable to bear the weight of the silence, did what she always did when cornered: throw a tantrum.

"Shut up, Andrew!" she snapped suddenly, crossing her arms with a childish huff, "No one asked you to butt into a girl fight!"

"Oh? Gonna cry now, princess? Want me to call daddy so he can comfort you?" Andrew shot back with a mocking grin.

Pippa covered her mouth to keep from laughing.

Alex let out an involuntary chuckle.

Manny's eyes widened. His noble hero defending justice just shattered in seconds.

"Shut up, you big dumb jock! You're like a mountain of muscle and zero brain!" Haley shouted, red with fury.

"Zero brain?" Andrew repeated, pretending to be shocked. "I'd like to remind you that I have better grades than you. So what does that make you? Negative zero?"

The comeback was so quick and dry that the reaction was instant.

Manny let out a short laugh, covering his mouth to keep it quiet.

Alex burst into a short laugh, unable to hold it in.

Pippa laughed too.

Even Luke laughed, despite not fully understanding the joke, he just joined in on the collective laughter.

Haley, realizing the crowd was no longer on her side, blushed even harder.

It was a foreign feeling for her: she was losing, and in a very humiliating way.

"I didn't mean that kind of brain!" Haley snapped, clenching her fists and raising her voice.

"I didn't mean that kind of brain!" Andrew repeated in a high-pitched, whiny voice, exaggeratedly mimicking her.

This time, Manny laughed out loud, unable to cover his mouth in time.

Alex nearly choked on her laughter. She hadn't expected such an over-the-top yet spot-on imitation of Haley's whiny tone.

Pippa had to hide her face in a sofa cushion.

Even Luke let out a genuine laugh and clapped, he found Andrew's impression hilarious.

"Shut up!" Haley screamed, cheeks burning red with embarrassment, as she hurled a pillow at Andrew.

Andrew caught it mid-air without flinching.

And as he did, he mimicked again in the same whiny voice, "Shut up!"

The room exploded with laughter.

Haley, red as a tomato and clearly losing ground, played what she thought was her last card.

"At least I don't have a secret album full of Natalie Portman photos!" she shouted, her voice cutting through the laughter.

Silence fell instantly.

Everyone stopped laughing and turned to look at Andrew.

His frozen expression for a brief second was all they needed to confirm it. It was true.

"You... bitch," Andrew muttered, staring at her like she'd just stabbed him in the back.

"Show us, show us!" Luke said excitedly, like they were about to uncover buried treasure.

"There's nothing to see," Andrew grumbled. "And I don't even have it here."

"So... it is true that you have a Natalie Portman album?" Pippa asked, raising an amused eyebrow.

"It's not Natalie Portman," Andrew corrected, raising a finger. "It's Padmé. There's a difference."

"And how exactly is that better?" asked Alex, crossing her arms.

"Because she's a Star Wars character! It's not like I'm obsessed with a real-life celebrity! I like the character, it's completely normal! Ask Leonard or Howard!" Andrew justified quickly.

Haley scoffed from her corner, "Oh, right. Totally normal. Just like building her a secret shrine in a photo album."

Alex let out a dry laugh.

"Besides," she added, looking at him with mockery, "I don't think Leonard and Howard are the best examples if you're trying to look good..."

'I was defending you five minutes ago... damn traitor,' Andrew thought, glaring at Alex.

Before Andrew could reply, a voice cut through the scene from the living room doorway.

"What album are we talking about?"

Everyone turned their heads and saw Jay, Gloria, Mitchell, Cam, and Claire standing there, who knows how long they'd been watching.

"Andrew has an album full of printed photos of some actress who plays one of those geeky characters he likes. It's a very big album... all printed pictures," Haley explained.

"It's better to have an album of Padmé than to have porn magazines, okay?!" Andrew blurted out, saying the first thing that came to mind with everyone staring at him.

Another brutal silence.

Mitchell closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Claire blinked slowly, trying to process what she'd just heard.

Jay muttered something like, "Could be worse."

Cam nodded in agreement with his son.

[Cam's comment]

"I've actually known about the album for a long time. And yes... it's weird. But honestly? I'd rather that than porn magazines."

[End comment]

Seeing he was now the sole focus of public humiliation, Andrew decided to act.

He turned slightly toward Claire and said in an innocent tone, "Since we're all sharing secrets... did you know, Aunt Claire, that Haley snuck out of the house last Saturday night to go to a party?"

Haley, who had just started to relax, looked at him in horror.

"Andrew, no!" Haley whispered.

But Andrew kept going, "And she didn't do it alone, by the way. Dylan helped her sneak out the window. Yes, family... Haley's back with Dylan. Again!"

The shock was immediate.

"What?" Claire said, her brow furrowing dangerously.

Jay let out a tired huff, like he'd heard that news at least seven or eight times before.

"Again, mi amor?" Gloria said, shaking her head at Haley.

Mitchell rolled his eyes, clearly unsurprised.

"Dylan again? Are there no other guys in California?" Cam muttered, more entertained by the drama than concerned.

"Oh, that's eight times Haley and Dylan have broken up and gotten back together. Think they'll make it to double digits?" Alex said with a mocking smile.

"Haley, we're going to talk. After dinner. We'll see what your punishment will be," Claire said in a deathly calm tone.

That "we're going to talk" sounded more like a sentence than a conversation.

Luke, not fully grasping the gravity of the situation, settled happily into his chair and said, "I bet they break up again before Halloween!"

Haley, now fully aware she was screwed, between the looming punishment and the mountain of public humiliation, looked at Andrew with seething fury.

"How the hell do you even know about that?" she asked.

"You weren't exactly subtle talking about your 'romantic escape' with Dylan at school," Andrew replied.

"Pro tip for next time: try being more discreet."

Haley clenched her jaw, collapsing into the sofa in defeat.

Andrew's "secret," while weird, nerdy, and maybe slightly creepy to some, was ultimately harmless.

Hers, on the other hand, was a whole different story.

She had snuck out of the house at night with her older boyfriend, and now the entire family knew she was back with Dylan yet again.

It was humiliating.

"Eight times? That should be illegal," Mitch muttered to Cam, who gave him a soft elbow to keep quiet.

"Haley, that relationship isn't healthy," commented Manny, entering full therapist mode, speaking in a deep and serious tone.

Haley, out of patience and completely out of dignity, raised her hand like she was trying to stop traffic.

"Let's not talk about this anymore! Is the food ready?" Haley asked, desperate to change the subject.

But before Gloria could even open her mouth to answer, Andrew raised his hand.

"Hold on. I'm not finished yet," he said with a serious expression.

Everyone looked at him, surprised.

Andrew slowly turned toward Alex, who had been thoroughly enjoying watching her cousin and sister get humiliated.

"Aunt Claire," Andrew said, shifting his gaze toward his aunt, "I'd recommend keeping a closer eye on how Alex uses the internet."

"What are you talking about?" Claire asked, confused.

"A few days ago, I lent Alex my laptop. Supposedly, she needed it for a project. Later, when I went to use it again, I couldn't remember the name of a page I'd visited, so I checked the browser history..." Andrew began, in the tone of a prosecuting attorney. freewebnøvel.com

"And it turns out, I found some pages Alex had visited. They weren't exactly educational."

Alex's eyes widened in horror, already realizing where this was going, but Andrew didn't stop.

"Twilight fanfiction. Rated 18+ content. Literature porn!" Andrew said.

A murmur rippled through the room.

"Fanfiction? Is that like... fans writing their own stories?" asked Phil, who had just arrived a few minutes earlier.

He had finally managed to print the photo, but it definitely didn't seem like the right time to bring it up.

"Correct. But not just any stories. Explicit 18+ and... homosexual stories," Andrew nodded.

Claire's mouth fell slightly open, speechless.

Haley, who had been the center of scandal moments ago, covered her mouth to keep from bursting out laughing.

Manny blinked, utterly confused.

Pippa raised an eyebrow at Alex.

Seeing that everyone was processing the information, Andrew added, in an educational tone:

"For those who don't know, that technically makes her a fujoshi."

"Fujo-what?" asked Jay, frowning.

"Fujoshi," Andrew explained, "It's a Japanese term for girls who enjoy reading or watching romantic stories between boys."

Cam and Mitch glanced at Alex and instinctively took a cautious step away from her.

Claire just stared at Alex, caught somewhere between horror, bewilderment, and not knowing whether to scream or laugh.

Alex, red as a tomato, crossed her arms and sank deeper into the couch, glaring at Andrew like she was already plotting her long-term revenge.

"You... are a dead man," Alex muttered under her breath, her voice full of dangerous intensity.

"If I fall, you're all falling with me," Andrew said, pointing dramatically at Alex, who glared daggers at him.

Manny, who had been quiet until now, desperately trying to stay under the radar, completely misunderstood the look.

He raised his hands like he was surrendering.

"I didn't laugh at anything!" he quickly justified.

Before things could escalate even further, Gloria, on the verge of losing her patience, intervened:

"Enough! Everyone to the table! I don't want to hear another word about drama, accusations, or secrets! My food does not deserve to be ignored because of your secrets!"

The group, still murmuring and whispering among themselves, began moving toward the dining room.

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