My Alphas' Dark Desires-Chapter 142: Deep Seethed Pain

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Chapter 142

~Valerie’s POV~

It was already twenty minutes yet... I still had constant flashes of that night. Pain had a way of hollowing things out.

Like it carved you from the inside, piece by piece, until all you had left were the echoes of everything you were trying to forget.

So I hid.

I didn’t return to my dorm after classes, and I didn’t go to the library, the cafeteria, or even the rooftop, where I sometimes sat with Astraea or Isla.

I slipped and disappeared through the side paths until I found my way to the training centre, picking up my training outfit.

I met two students there who were training in hand-to-hand combat. I slipped inside and hid in a quiet corner, masking my scent to escape being seen.

After about forty minutes, they packed their bags and water cans and left. I waited, inspected the arena for another ten minutes to ensure no one was coming.

Once I was sure, I made my way to the training ring at the centre, picking my weapons, a bow and arrows.

No one was there. It was perfect for letting loose.

The lights had already gone off in most of the arena. But I didn’t need them. I wasn’t here to see. I was here to release.

I started with archery.

My fingers wrapped tightly around the bowstring, my eyes fixed on my target post, drawing back repeatedly.

The leather grip of the string burned against my skin, but I welcomed the sting.

Thwack.

Every arrow I released pierced the centre of the target with ruthless precision—one shot for the wolves that burned my home.

I inhaled, letting the rage come back, and welcomed the feelings of deep pain as I drew another arrow.

Another arrow for the council of Alphas that claimed they didn’t know and buried the incident claiming it would weaken the kingdom when Uncle Zade had presented the matter to them ten years back.

Thawk!

Another for the red-eyed man who still haunted me and another... for the mate who didn’t look back.

I kept going until my arm ached.

Then I switched.

Kicked off my shoes and made my way to the boxing corner. The floor was cold, but I didn’t feel it.

I wore my boxing gloves and slammed my fists into the padded bag, sweat already beading down my back.

Each punch came harder and faster than the last as I bounced on my feet, my toes holding me firmly. Then I kicked, letting my leg sweep up with deadly precision as I had been trained to do.

My breath came in ragged bursts but none of what I did seemed to quench the fire inside of me.

No matter how many times I went at it, no matter how my muscles burned, nothing could compare to the pain.

The way my dad fell. The way my mother screamed for me to run, trying to protect me as those slashes came down on her... her eyes, her smile...

Everything poured through me in torrents and then—

I screamed.

Not words or names, just pure rage. Then I hit again and again.

And again.

I didn’t know how long I’d been going at it. Time had blurred, like everything else. But when a click echoed in the distance and one of the far lights flickered on, I still didn’t stop.

I didn’t even look up. I kicked harder, imagining that the boxing bag was a giant, my enemies, my thorned problems were all giants I needed to punch till they were no more.

Let them watch.

Let whoever it was see how shattered I had become because maybe, just maybe, I didn’t care anymore.

I blamed myself over and over again. I questione din my mind, why had I survived and they had not?

The punching bag swung back toward me, and I met it with another blow, my knuckles raw now, my breath rasping.

Then warm, strong arms suddenly wrapped around me from behind.

I gasped, twisting hard in instinct—my elbow cocked back, ready to strike whoever it was. I spun fast—

But he caught my wrist. Held it, and before I could fully understand what or who had me, he pulled me into him.

I froze as his scent assaulted my nostrils.

Kai.

His eyes met mine—not glowing, not harsh. Those emerald green eyes were there, holding my gaze quietly, like a storm feels just before it rains.

I didn’t speak, and neither did Kai.

Instead, my breath hitched, and my knees began to tremble beneath me. My throat burned. My chest felt too tight. I had been holding it all in—everything—and now, it spilt.

Hot tears rushed down my cheeks quietly.

Kai’s arms wrapped tighter around me, holding me like he’d known I would fall apart the second someone touched me gently.

And I did.

I screamed again—but this time into his chest. His shirt soaked up the sound. His body anchored me. His earthy, clean scent with a faint trace of frost settled in my lungs like something safe.

Kai said nothing for a while. Then, his deep voice came low, barely above a whisper as if scared I’d run when he spoke. "I saw you... earlier. In the courtyard."

I stilled.

Kai’s hand moved up to cup the back of my head. "When he looked away. You looked like someone had gutted you."

I clenched my jaw, but didn’t respond. That was not the reason for my outburst, though it looked that way.

"I just needed to make sure..." His breath paused. "Is that why you’re crying? Did Dristan hurt you?"

My fingers curled into his shirt. Still, I said nothing.

Not yes or no. All I gave was just silence.

Kai didn’t press. He just looked down at me, sadness flickering in those normally unreadable eyes.

Then, he leaned in slowly, so slowly and in that moment, his lips brushed against mine, barely touching. Just enough for me to feel the question in it.

A moment passed but Kai respected my boundaries and waited, ghosting silently over my lips. My heart skipped several beats and in the next second... I kissed him back.

Not because I wanted to punish Dristan or out of confusion or even out of pity but because for that moment, I saw my pain in Kai’s eyes.

Like he’d lost something too.

And when our lips finally met—fully—it was soft and rough all at once.

His hand slid to my waist, gripping tight like he needed the kiss as much as I did. My arms wrapped around his neck as his lips moved over mine, gentle at first... then deeper.

Hungrier.

But still... sad.

There was no heat in this kiss. No lust. Just need. Two broken things finding warmth.

His mouth opened against mine, coaxing me to forget, to breathe, to lean into the comfort he was giving.

And I did.

For once, I let someone hold my grief.

When the kiss broke, our foreheads stayed pressed together, our breath shared between the inches of air between us.

His hands rested on my hips. Mine gripped the sides of his jacket.

"I’m here for you," he murmured, voice rasping softly near my ear. "Anytime. No matter what."

I swallowed.

My tears had stopped, but my heart still ached. Still, I whispered, "Thank you."

Kai pulled me in again, tucking my head under his chin as his arms enveloped me once more. And we just stood there—no words, no explanations.

Just two wolves in the quiet. And for the first time since seeing those red eyes again...

I didn’t feel like I had to fight alone.